Hope is the thing...: September 2005

Friday, September 30, 2005

33 Days Home

I'm reporting from New York today, the first business trip I've felt I could safely take in a year.

John seems to have settled into that schedule that befits his age - rising after noon, leaving around dinner and returning in the middle of the night. His energy level seems low and his thoughts about getting on with life seem repressed. He has always been wary of new situations and life with someone else's blood certainly qualifies, I suppose.

Courtney's computer died this week. After an hour on hold with Dell, they shipped a new hard drive, which we have to install and then try to reload everything out of her dead hard drive. It used to be that father's only had to know how to fix bicycles.

The Job Fair at the World Congress Center Tuesday was quite an event. Debbie and I trained 50 or more lawyers from her firm and BellSouth last week on the law of starting life over after a disaster. The fair was "flooded" with 15,000 job seekers by noon, twice as many as expected for the whole day, and they had to shut the doors. The firm saw well over 1oo Katrina victims and gave a lot of helpful advice. One lawyer spent almost 2 hours helping a woman with concerns.

Several of the BellSouth lawyers that I trained and used to work with carried the materials and their experience down to Louisiana the next day to meet with company employees that had lost their homes. All of that is to say that a well placed good deed can multiply many times over.

I got a request yesterday to work on help for company victims of Hurricane Rita. I hope I have something to offer for them as well.

7:34 AM | Permalink |

Friday, September 23, 2005

Life is a Hurricane - Day 26

I've spent much of the past three weeks on Katrina relief, so life returning to "normal" has had to wait. It started with looking into ways to help fellow employees navigate the relief waters and then picked up steam. I gathered disaster legal manuals, and since none had
Georgia information, wrote one of my own last weekend.

Debbie's firm found an opportunity to offer legal counseling at a Job Fair next week at the World Congress Center, where thousands are expected. We took my manual and have been doing training sessions for lawyers on the basic questions they are likely to get. Some of those being trained have been BellSouth lawyers, and I hope they will take the information to their "tent city" of employees.

I have set up two websites with information about hurricane relief. One is internal to the company and the other is on a site under my own name for those outside the company to get information.

Now with Rita nearing the coast, there will be more to do, I fear.

John continues to improve. He is doing well enough to see his doctor every other week, though he still has weekly blood tests. His next drop in immune suppression drugs is next week. He gets out every day and is dating and seeing friends, but his life is otherwise still on hold for now, not unlike mine has been these three weeks.

6:17 AM | Permalink |

Saturday, September 17, 2005

And in other news - Day 20

There is not much news on John to report right now. His doctor says he only needs to seeJohn every other week, but will still get weekly blood tests. That seems to be a good sign. I don't see all that much of John myself, since he keeps college hours, coming in during the night and sleeping until the afternoon.

Courtney is settling in nicely. She visited friends in Athens last night and, get this, is going to the Georgia Tech football game today.

Since returning, much of my time has been filled with work on helping Katrina victims. We have a number affected at the company and know of many more. The list of "legal" problems people face in a disaster is long and assistance can make the steps less overwhelming. Several of us visited with company victims in Baton Rouge. I build a page on the company Intranet with materials for them to use. Because some can't access that page and there are literally millions of others with the same problems, I used "my" webpage to post similar information for victims, and also for lawyers working to help. It is now at http://www.randycadenhead.com.

There are stories of all types from the hurricane, but many of the saddest and even cruelest are now surfacing. I know some too terrible to relate. In the face of all they find now, hope is hard to find alone.

4:30 AM | Permalink |

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

If you feel sorry for yourself - Day 17

...Take a trip to Louisiana. Yesterday, I flew with two other lawyers to Baton Rouge to work with employees of our company that are homeless and facing the challenge of rebuilding their lives. Those employees that the company could find have been housed in hotel rooms -crowded, but welcome. We explained the way that FEMA applications are supposed to work, and learned from them that, in most cases so far, it's not working.

Still, most of those we saw shared tips with each other and took at least that part of the situation in stride, seemingly realistic about how long it would take to recover and thankful to have what they do. Several said that it was all too easy to find others in worse situations.

One man, whose son has lymphoma, evacuated his family to a northern state where medical care could be continued. He just shrugged and said "what can you do", when I asked how he could deal with all that. There was a woman whose only possession from her old life was the wallet in her hand and she was glad she didn't have to replace the things in it.

Despite the "carry on" approach, there was an empty look and a downcast glance in the eyes of most everyone I met. You could see that they were traumatized inside.

It doesn't take much to appreciate light in the dark and John's situation seems pretty bright compared to all that I saw yesterday. He has ventured to Athens for a night and has begun to look into finding an apartment of his own with a roommate who has some paramedic training. We watch John's health carefully for the slightest things, but so far, he continues to improve and we are thankful for that one very big thing.

Courtney is now enrolled in the new SCAD Atlanta campus and living in the "dorm," a converted motel in Midtown. She has her own room overlooking the pool (if you lean far enough to one side and crane your neck.)

5:31 AM | Permalink |

Saturday, September 10, 2005

The More Things Change...Day 13

The more there is to update, and so it has been for a week. I caught the seemingly popular cold that is going around and spent my time at home wearing a mask and carrying around tissues and a bottle of Purel. Debbie's days were busy. Courtney spent the week waiting for confirmation that she could attend SCAD's new campus here in Atlanta this Fall (yes, she will start next Wednesday, but we still have to work on whether she will live in the dorm).

While in Seattle, John got to know a girl at Emory here in Atlanta through his friends. They got to know each other via cell phone and IM (instant messaging, the preferred form of communication for anyone his age). They are now dating, and it has given John energy and someone to direct it toward. The two had never met in person and had only seen pictures of each other. It's all very cute and you have to be happy for him - well, for them.

John has begun to shave again and has hints of hair on his head. He has become comfortable going out in public without his "Andy Worhol" wig or a hat. The hours he keeps are such that we don't see very much of him. I'm sure he is glad to have others to be around, although I do think of myself as reasonably good company.

Health-wise, John continues to progress. The clinic staff enjoy seeing him - a successful patient in a cancer clinic has to be refreshing. He does have some slight sign of a rash on his legs, and we are watching that. GVHD can erupt, and so you watch the volcano for any sign of smoke. So far, that is all we see.

He is on a clinical trial for an anti-viral drug. He takes the traditional version each day and then either the stronger one or a placebo. Once a week, we overnight blood samples back to Seattle. There is value to us in participating, because the Seattle doctors see his actual blood results each week, so they have a good record on hand if he develops any problems.

John picked up an apartment guide this week and has begun thinking about a place of his own. Someone he grew up with is looking as well, and so he may have a roommate to share the costs with. I think he would be the roommate from hell myself, but he certainly is tired of living at home. It is rewarding to see him thinking of the future, given the year that we spent worrying about each day. He is a long way from being "well", but it is good to see the horizon again.

Apart from unpacking, moving back in, cleaning and a cold, I have been busy working on ways to address the legal needs of the 1000 or so company employees displaced by Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans. Once food, shelter and medical needs get met, they will have to rebuild their lives. Insurance claims, FEMA applications, lost records and much more will become important. I have an idea what it is like to have your life taken over by something different and am working, along with many others, to try to help.

6:14 AM | Permalink |

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Home Again - Day 4

It is Thursday, just before Labor Day, and we are all back in Atlanta, 95 days from leaving for Seattle. We flew back a northerly route to avoid Katrina, which resulted in Atlanta being a wetter place than Seattle. In fact, it rained a lot more in Atlanta over the 5 months than where we were.

Before we left, I returned the car we were loaned. It was such a perfect example of the goodness of perfect strangers. As I was riding my bike back to the house, I happened upon a Goodwill store. Since it had come from another of their centers, I had to stop, donate it and walk the last few miles home.

John grew anxious to get back and irritable over the last few weeks and days. When we finally got back, he went inside, got his car keys and left to see friends. He had told only one that he would be back and wanted to surprise them, which I think he was able to do.

After a couple of days of connecting, John's energy level dropped and he has been resting today. In fact, he has some congestion and a sore throat. Because it takes so little to cause real risk, I spent some time on the phone with Emory and his doctor. They felt that his scheduled visit tomorrow should be sufficient, unless he spikes a fever.

Even with all the help from family and the Georgia Tech yard crew, there is so much to do that it is overwhelming. I'm tired and am adjusting to the idea of living with long-term lingering worries, rather than adrenalin fueled fears. Debbie feels much the same.

There was a young transplant patient from Atlanta who returned early this year and is now playing high school football again. He got a well-deserved newspaper spread, though playing football isn't that good an idea for someone when it might be their own blood they could spill. John's return was overshadowed by the apocalypse in Louisiana and along the coast. I went back to the office as we were looking for thousands of employees and their families in the area.

It all seems a terrible reminder of how nature and neighbors can turn on one another. At the same time, so many have helped us out and are helping those in need now. It's hard to know which view of it all is right - the gifts of strangers and happening upon a thrift store or the cyclone of wind and violence from the south. Life and human nature are fragile things.

5:42 PM | Permalink |

Hope is the thing...

Hope is the thing with feathers, that perches in the soul... Emily Dickinson